DISCUSSION FORUM

From learning your child's diagnosis to telling family. From hearing those first words to getting dressed and going to school (and beyond). Even dealing with school yard bullies. There's great courage in our children! Tell us about it.


Autism Hangout: Learning, sharing, thriving!

Posted - 12/26/2008 :  12:59:58      

I have never been more proud of my 18 yr old son (Aspie) as I was this Christmas. Two things specifically. First... while it was very difficult for him to brave the crowded mall, he did a great job. The gifts he purchased for each family member were thoughtfully selected based on the interests of each of us. Secondly, as an 18 year old, he received gifts that were much less "fun" and much more "practical" this year. He was disappointed, but he reacted like a trooper. I am very proud of AG.



Frank
Autism Hangout

Posted - 12/29/2008 :  12:47:32      

Cool, Frank! And congrats to AG!

Craig


Autism Hangout: Learning, sharing, thriving!

Posted - 03/04/2009 :  08:47:03        

I sat with Michael's mother in the back of the church where Michael and my daughter were practicing for the Christmas play. Michael, who has autism and was 8 years old was sitting by my daughter Lynn, then 5. He was really pestering her a lot. At one of the breaks, Michael's mom talked to Lynn, saying, "I know Michael is bugging you. Keep giving him a chance to be friends. He has autism, so he needs more chances." Lynn said, "It's OK. My sister has autism, too. I know how it is."
Michael's mom told me about this later, and I took a big idea away from it. "Kids with autism need more chances."

Posted - 03/09/2009 :  07:47:27      

quote:

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"Kids with autism need more chances."
Lassie

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Posted - 08/15/2009 :  11:40:19    

I would put my son's "potty training" from diapers to "sitting alone" in just over a year as a huge development. He is going to be 11 in seven weeks and being non-verbal, having constipation issues and pain made this such a long and trying experience. We still monitor and cheer the progress, but he is now doing most of the process on his own. I hope this isn't too "crappy" of a post :), but I know some parents are going crazy regarding this issue out there!

- Steve
http://www.examiner.com/x-17410-Tol...ing-Examiner

Posted - 08/15/2009 :  19:19:05      

That's GREAT news, Steve! Thanks for the moving post.


Autism Hangout: Learning, sharing, thriving!

Posted - 09/11/2010 :  11:13:45    

Well, I've been chasing after this young gent I love for the past couple of years - clumsily, of course. When he finally returns my affections, being blessed with this stupid syndrome, I have no idea what he's talking about and (accidentally) turn him down!

So goddamn close!

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"My friends are all strangers" - Baggage by L7

Posted - 09/21/2010 :  07:57:30      

What's meant to be will come around again, S17.


Autism Hangout: Learning, sharing, thriving!

Posted - 03/07/2011 :  09:59:41    

I was an undiagnosed Aspie until just a couple of months into my deployment to Afghanistan last year. I was able to get the diagnosis, and some of the trouble I had in my unit has lessened. I guess what I am saying is this: Even though I have Asperger Syndrome, I have managed to grow up, join the Army, and make it as far as I have. I would eventually like to write a book about life as an Aspie Soldier as well. I want people to be able to see my story and use it as an inspiration for others (speaking about it if I don't go into overstimulation mode. My point is that just because one is autistic, doesn't mean one must bow down to the stereotypical labels and stigmas society places upon us.

Words build bridges into unexplored regions.--Adolf Hitler

Posted - 05/09/2011 :  18:34:28  

I had the pleasure this weekend of a stranger in the shopping mall calling me an 'a######' because my 4 year old son with ASD got a little riled up and knocked over his toddler in the play area. No real harm, no real foul on my son, nothing that couldnt hav happened with a typical rambunctious boy. But still my wife says I should have explained my son's condition. I disagree...since his diagnosis i never have felt it necessary to say so. Have any of you been in a situation where a stranger confront s you about your child's inappropriate behavior? What did you do? Was it necessary to explain your child's condition?

Edited by - steve matt on 05/09/2011 18:39:58

Posted - 08/31/2011 :  22:30:57    

quote:

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Originally posted by geisler

I was an undiagnosed Aspie until just a couple of months into my deployment to Afghanistan last year. I was able to get the diagnosis, and some of the trouble I had in my unit has lessened. I guess what I am saying is this: Even though I have Asperger Syndrome, I have managed to grow up, join the Army, and make it as far as I have. I would eventually like to write a book about life as an Aspie Soldier as well. I want people to be able to see my story and use it as an inspiration for others (speaking about it if I don't go into overstimulation mode. My point is that just because one is autistic, doesn't mean one must bow down to the stereotypical labels and stigmas society places upon us.\

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Posted - 10/17/2011 :  06:49:03  

What I still have to learn sometimes - my children know best what is good for themselves. And they have their very own way of looking at things.

In his first weeks at school, some older boys really picked on my son. After a long time he told me about it. I got really angry and tried to teach him ways to defend himself. He got upset, because I was angry... so I explained as calm as I could that I am not angry about him but about the other boys - he thought for a long time and then said - "No, mum, that is no anger-thing. I think I understand why they are picking at me. They pick at me because they are not sure, whether I am a true boy. By picking at me, they are testing whether I am a true boy. But they are wrong, because I am a true boy."

It seems like, having solved this question, he just stopped paying any attention to these boys (repetition of a social behaviour he has already analyzed is not interesting) - and some weeks after this, the special needs teacher told me that the older boys just adore him - because is sooooo cool...

I do not know whether I will ever be able to teach him how to defend himself - but I think he will be able to get along his way.

-+-+-+-+

not a native speaker so please excuse mistakes. 2 sons, one Asperger, one HFA

Edited by - Iris on 10/17/2011 06:50:04

Posted - 07/10/2012 :  04:36:38  

I read your post Iris and i think your son has done a great job by not paying attention to those boys. You don't need to teach him to defend himself because he himself will learn on his own on how to deal with such situation. It is a part of growing up. I have seen many boys who learn many things on their own without the interference of their parents or relatives.

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  17:10:38    

My family never accepted my diagnosis. That was bad enough, but my stepdad is an abusive person, and he was always making me feel so stupid and inept. The term "common sense" got thrown around constantly. I was always being punished or thrown out. He would yell at my mom so furiously every time she tried to stand up for me, that she stopped. I was helpless. My Autism used to be my curse. I hated it. I wished I could be normal so that I would be a more agreeable ward. Every day, I was endlessly harassed.

Then, early this year, I was given a chance at a better life. I took it. I am usually very wary of change indeed, but I have taught myself to do what scares me anyway. I moved far away from my family, and began to blossom. I realized it is not a curse to be Autistic, (though it still feels that way sometimes) and that I have more to offer than a dissertation on fractal theory or good cake. I found that you take me away from those negative NT, and I become a person with a tangible, seemingly positive future.

I got out from a terrible situation. It lead to my being more functional. Other negative people don't bother me as much, because I don't love them and want them to love me. So I am more confident and content to not give a crap what people think of me, which leads to me developing even more. I'm more driven. I'm functional. I am more happy, possibly, this is the happiest I have ever been.

~Spacie~

Posted - 03/01/2013 :  12:41:24    

Hey Spacie,
Congratulations for getting on with your life away from all the negativity. No one needs to put up with that type of behaviour. You sound like a very strong person to me, you should be extremely proud of yourself
All the best
M